


reverie

by TullyBleus



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Female Hange Zoë, Friends With Benefits, Is It Angst?, i aint thinking straight, idk - Freeform, its been a hundred days, levihan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28046589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TullyBleus/pseuds/TullyBleus
Summary: Cause when a heart breaks, no, it don't break even.Levihan modern AU oneshot.
Relationships: Erwin Smith/Hange Zoë, Levi/Hange Zoë
Comments: 20
Kudos: 126





	1. Chapter 1

"He left," the bespectacled woman mumbled, the rim of the glass still against her lips as she avoided his gaze. Her eyes were dark, brimming with unshed tears and cheeks pink from the alcohol that they're both consuming.

Levi put his own beer down and stared at her quizzically, an eyebrow quirked, knowing that he doesn't need to coax her to get the story.

Hange downed the last ounce of her vodka and slammed the glass, "He said he wants to fulfill his dreams first, to prove something to his family and himself. He went to Europe to take up an apprenticeship offer."

"And what exactly is he trying to prove?" Levi asked, swirling the remaining alcohol in the bottle.

She scoffed, a mirthless sound accompanied by the pouring of the alcoholic drink, "He wants to prove that he's going to be the best chemist out there."

The man took a drink from his bottle before responding bluntly, "Then, he's a prick. And an asshole. And the biggest idiot in the world."

Her head snapped towards his sharply, finally meeting his eyes, and he met her glare head-on, as if challenging her to contradict his words. He's always been straight-forward with his words and she's fully aware of that.

Her lips stretched in to a smile and she suddenly began to giggle, which evolved to a full-blown laughter with her characteristic snorts.

"Yeah," she managed to speak between her laugh, "He's definitely a prick."

Levi shrugged off the fluttering in his chest at the sound of her laughter, at the evident lightening of her eyes, at her upturned lips.

* * *

"What the fuck are you doing, shitty glasses?" He asked in irritation.

"I'm reading, obviously," she answered, oblivious of the man's growing annoyance.

"I can see that; my eyesight is significantly better than yours," he retorted.

"Eh? Then why are you asking what I'm doing?"

A vein twitched on his forehead, "You're. Reading. On. My. Lap."

Hange moved the book away from her face and looked up at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes, "Is it bothering you?"

Levi scowled down at her and resisted the urge to rip the book from her hand, "I'm going to stand up and let you fall to the floor. Mark my words, shitty glasses."

She grinned, all teeth and full of joy, eyes bright behind those hideous glasses, "I don't think you would," she replied with certainty.

He wouldn't, and they both know that.

Still, he continued to scowl and he took the book away from her, ignoring her indignant 'Hey!'

He threw the book to the other side of the couch, "You need to sleep, four-eyes."

She pouted, "I'm not sleepy yet!"

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes. You. Are."

"No. I'm. Not."

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am!" she huffed out before realization dawned on her face, "Wha- you midget!"

She tried to push her hand to his face, but he easily caught her wrist. She frowned up at him and he glared back. His eyes took in the dark circles under her eyes, eyelids halfway closed, her face pale with exhaustion.

"You've been awake for more than 24 hours now," he stated, fingers tightening slightly around her wrist, "You look like shit. You need to sleep."

"I don't want to," she continued to whine, bottom lip sticking out childishly.

_Adorably._

His scowl deepened, trying to fight off the warmth the started to creep up towards his neck, and snatched the glasses off her face, "Sleep, Hange," he ordered.

Hange huffed, "Fine, mother!"

She turned to her side, her cheek against his thigh and one hand laid flat against the cushion. After a few minutes, her breathing had evened out, light snores escaping her slightly parted lips. Levi stared, a warm feeling spreading from his chest to his fingers, down to his toes as he studied her profile. Her hooked nose, her pink lips, her arched brows…

He ignored it, because it's fucked up, because she's his best friend.

He laid a hand on her head, fingers running through her messy brown hair. Giving in to the temptation, he leaned down and pressed a feather light kiss on her brow.

* * *

One side of Levi's closet was filled with Hange's clothes. And Levi owns a drawer of his stuff at Hange's apartment.

She's not concerned about it, saying that they're friends and it's perfectly _normal_ to have their things at one another's place since they're so used at having sleepovers, anyway.

But Levi is bothered because they're not kids anymore; it should not be a normal thing for them to have keys of each other's apartments', to sleep at each other's place, on one bed, with Hange cuddling up to him in the middle of the night, with his arms wrapped around her frame.

It scares him, this _feeling_ that grows inside of him, because Hange is his childhood friend, best friend and a friend's ex-girlfriend. Whatever _this_ is, it could potentially ruin what they have.

But as she snuggled closer to him, her warmth surrounding him, with his arms around her shoulders, those concerns seemed far away.

* * *

Without withdrawing his lips, Levi's hands drifted down, hurried fingers removing her shirt's buttons, some even popped off due to his impatient movements. Hange sighed against his lips, shrugging off her shirt and wrapping her arms around his neck, pressing her chest against his.

Levi can't even remember how they ended up in this situation. He arrived at his apartment and found Hange, already lounging on his couch and a bottle of unopened wine on his coffee table.

The next thing he knew is that the wine was still uncorked, he's sitting on the couch with his best friend on his lap, with her knees on either side of his thighs and they're kissing. It's all lips and tongue and it's utterly _messy_ but Levi couldn't care less because her hands were on his shoulders, his nape, his hair and he definitely wanted _more._

A voice from the back of his mind was telling him, _reprimanding him_ , of the possible consequences that will come from his actions, if he let his hands wander any further from where they perched on her hips. But the voice grew smaller and smaller until it was almost non-existent when her hands – _those abnormally warm hands_ – drifted down and began to pull his shirt from where it was tucked in.

* * *

They fucked.

Afterwards, with Hange asleep on his bed and her body turned away from him, the guilt and doubts began to creep back in his mind. He slept with his best friend, who also happened to be an ex-girlfriend of his friend.

And the biggest question is, what exactly are they? Can he still call this… relationship as 'friendship'?

* * *

He finally asked her the question after the third time that they had sex in her apartment.

"What the fuck are we, Hange?" he whispered against her shoulder blade. He had his chest pressed against her back, arms around her waist, skin bare and fitted intimately together. With the way they're pressed, Levi could feel the tensing of her form, hear the hitch on her breath at the unexpected question and he already got the answer.

"We're friends, Levi," she whispered back.

Levi pointedly ignored the sudden pain that erupted inside his chest, the feeling of _something_ being broken inside of him. He ignored the tightening of his chest, the painful beating of his heart, and merely nodded his head, his nose against the nape of her neck, closing his eyes tightly to stop the tears that had begun to well in his eyes.

* * *

They've been doing _this_ for more than a year when Levi received a proposition from her.

"Hey, Levi," she suddenly exclaimed, her chin propped on his naked chest.

He opened his eyes with a sigh, "What is it, four-eyes?"

She pushed herself up, her elbows digging on the mattress and her grin was excited, exuberant, infectious and Levi had to clench his jaw to keep himself from grinning back.

"I have an offer that you _definitely_ cannot decline to," she declared, lips still stretched in a grin.

He scoffed and covered his eyes with his forearm, so he doesn't have to look into those bright, brown eyes, eyes that seemed to draw him in every time he stared at them for too long.

"I don't have a fucking choice, do I?" he asked rhetorically.

"Nope!" she answered and put a hand on the middle of his chest, "Hey, Levi! Listen to me!"

"I'm listening," he groaned. Apparently still unsatisfied, she took hold of his wrist and removed his arm from his face. He turned his head and glared up at her.

Her grin only widened, "I have an offer that you just _couldn't_ resist."

His glare intensified, "What exactly is that, shitty glasses?"

"Hey! I'm not wearing my lenses right now!" she protested.

"All the same. Still shitty glasses."

"Hey!" she whined and smacked his chest lightly, "I'm gonna tell you something!"

"Four-eyes, get on with it."

The grin returned to her lips and she cleared her throat, "Okay, okay. I was reading this really cool book, and it was about these two rival lawyers and they had to solve this really tough case because they figured out that they're – "

"Four-eyes," he interjected exasperatedly, "Get to the point. What is it?"

"Yeah… well…" she suddenly looked abashed, her cheeks light pink and her eyes looking to the side, "They made some sort of a… pact."

His eyebrow quirked, intrigued, "A pact?"

She met his curious gaze, cheeks still dusted pink, "A _marriage_ pact."

He blinked, "A what now?"

Her smile turned teasing, "I thought you have perfectly good hearing? Do you need to get your ears checked, short-stack?"

He scowled and flicked her forehead with his forefinger, "I heard you, four-eyes. I'm asking you to _elaborate_."

She giggled and shifted, her finger drawing invisible circles on his bicep, "Yeah, a marriage pact. Here, listen to this: if, by the time we're both 35 and still single, we have to get married."

He paused, "… Is that a proposal?"

"I suppose, yeah."

"That's less than two years from now."

"I know."

"You got that idea from _the_ book?"

"Uh-huh."

"… you're reading too much, shitty glasses," he replied, a futile attempt to avoid the subject at hand. The thought of being married to Hange made butterflies flutter around his stomach, made his heart pound with excitement and anticipation, and he's almost afraid that she can hear the erratic beating in his chest.

"Hey!" she pouted and lightly pinched his arm, "I'm serious, Levi! What do you say?"

He scoffed and grasped the back of her head, fingers tangling on the messy brown mess atop her head as he kissed her, trying to convey his answer through their kiss.

"We'll see in two years, Hange," he instead mumbled against her lips.

* * *

Their friends notice and tease them about it. How they were always together, how much time they spend at each other's place, how they seemed to get touchy with each other when they get drunk.

Hange merely laughed and said that it's normal, that it's a thing that best friends normally do.

Levi scowled every time but he was bothered by it, in truth. Because you don't just kiss your best friend on the forehead or the cheeks or the _lips_ or sleep with them regularly. One shouldn't get flustered when said _best friend_ gives you a tight hug. One shouldn't have their heart beating erratically when your _best friend_ gives you a smile. One shouldn't stare at their _best friend's_ sleeping face – like a fucking creep – just to admire their imperfectly perfect profile.

Levi is bothered, and he aches, because he never counted on the fact that he'll be falling in love with his _best friend_ , that's a friend's ex, that sees everything that they do as part of a norm, when even the minute things that he does for her practically screams as _abnormal_.

* * *

"He's back," she commented when they finished eating their dinner at his apartment.

Levi knew. He knew for a while now because he was invited by his friend to go for a drink a week ago and he declined, because he promised Hange that they will go to see that movie that she'd been wanting to see.

If he's being completely honest, he doesn't think he can face Erwin right now, because it brings forth an onslaught of guilt and rage. Guilt at falling in love with his ex; rage at the fact that he had the _gall_ to return to his life, to her life.

Because Erwin's return couldn't be more ill-timed, especially when it's only six months until his 35th birthday.

"He asked me out for dinner tomorrow," she continued, barely contained excitement in her voice, "To… you know, catch up."

Levi only nodded and cleaned up the plates, ignoring, once again, the heavy stone of dread that settled on his stomach.

* * *

She didn't come to his apartment that night. He didn't try to go to her apartment, either.

Levi laid on his bed, staring up at the ceiling and spent the night trying hard to imagine Hange's warmth beside him. He didn't succeed.

* * *

When Hange came the next night, she was practically _glowing,_ shaking with excitement, and all she can talk about is _Erwin_ , _Erwin, Erwin._

"Oh, and Erwin got hired in our company," she exclaimed after drinking the last of her wine.

Levi gulped his own tea – once, twice – because his mouth was suddenly dry, his chest was tightening as his heart clenched painfully.

"I see," was his only answer when he found his voice. He tried to tune out her babblings but that fucking name always seemed to pop up every time she opened her mouth. _Erwin, Erwin, Erwin._

She didn't stay the night, claiming that she had work to do in her apartment and Levi lets her, doing his best not to beg her to stay.

* * *

Hange's visits had been getting scarce and long in-between and, when she does, she's most likely on her phone, smiling and giggling quietly at something on the screen. She no longer stays the night.

He figured out that he had to get used on sleeping alone, without Hange's body and warmth beside him.

* * *

The last time that she visited, he'd been in a long, tiring day at work, his insomnia had been running rampant and all he can hear from her is _Erwin, Erwin, Erwin._

"Did you forget what he did to you?" he finally snapped at her, eyes dark and narrowed as he glared at her.

She blinked and fell silent for a few moments, her head bowed and avoiding his glare.

"He left you, Hange," he continued, his exhausted mind and broken heart driving him to say the words that had been burning inside his throat, "He left you, remember? He left you to chase that stupid dream and left you alone, _crying_ , because – "

"He wouldn't do it again," she interrupts quietly.

"What?" he asked in surprised confusion.

When she raised her head, Levi was astounded to see that she was glaring back at him, anger dancing in her eyes, "He wouldn't do it again, Levi. I know it because he promised me."

He was silent for a few seconds until realization dawned on his face, his eyes widening and his jaw slackening, "Don't tell me…"

"That I got back with Erwin?" she finished, a hint of challenge in her voice as she stood up, fists clenched on her side, "Yes, I did, Levi. What are you going to do about it?"

He snapped out of his shock, "What the fuck were you thinking, four-eyes?!" he almost yelled.

"You don't understand, Levi!" she yelled back, tears welling in her eyes as she continued to glare, "I've been waiting for this for _three fucking years!_ I've been waiting for _him_!"

Levi closed his mouth with a snap, his jaw clenching, feeling his heart break a million times over at the words that she just uttered.

"So, what was I to you these past three years?" he almost whispered, his strength leaving him as he waited for her answer.

"You're my best friend – "

He didn't let her finish. He turned his back to her and entered his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

* * *

She didn't ask him to come out, to talk it out as she normally would in this situation. When Levi exited his room some four hours later, she was already gone.

His chest felt hollow, as if she'd taken his heart with her when she left.

* * *

He fell into a monotonous routine. He got up after having two hours of sleep, he worked, he got back to an empty apartment. He didn't call her; she didn't try to contact him.

Weekends were the worst. Every nook and canny of his apartment reminded him of Hange and staying inside almost seemed suffocating. His kitchen made him recall of that time when she failed to make pasta. He remembered that time when they stayed up all-night, binge-watching _Friends_ in his living room. When he opened his closet, he sees her stuff, still on one side. He remembered the times that they spent on his bed, talking, laughing, cuddling.

He can't stay in this place any longer. He got out and bought a bunch of boxes. He contacted the owner of the first apartment listing that he saw, packed his shit up and moved out after two days. He took her stuff with him; he can't bear to part with these just yet. If he can have just a little reminder of her with him, maybe it will be better. Maybe he can sleep better while he hugged one of her shirts as he imagined her warmth. Maybe he can lose himself while reading her messy and disorganized notes.

Maybe if he kept these things, it'll eventually drown out the feeling of misery that continued to rise up day after day.

* * *

It was rare for him to scroll through social media but, as he sat on his couch, with the unopened boxes of his things still around him, he grabbed his phone and opened an app. And the first thing that he saw is a picture of Hange and Erwin, facing each other with their hands entwined. The photo must be a candid one, since she looked like she's laughing and Erwin was looking at her with an amused smile.

It made him happy, seeing her smile again, but the caption of the photo broke his heart all over again.

_'Three years and I still love you.'_

Levi put the phone down harshly, the device landing with a thud on the coffee table and he ran a frustrated hand down his face. He took a sip of his drink, the brown, bitter liquid burning his tongue, warming his throat and finally settling in his stomach, further stoking the fire of jealousy, envy and misery that's residing inside of him.

Tears welled in his eyes, tears that he will never, will not allow himself to shed. He'd been with her for more than a decade. He's with her during those three years that she's talking about.

In those three years, where exactly was he?

* * *

_"Hang on to the reverie, could you do that for me? Cause I'm just too sad to."_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because regret never came first.

For the first few days, Hange was over the moon.

Erwin is back and he promised her that, this time, he will stay. That he will never leave her side again. What's more is that he got hired at the same company as hers.

But she can't help but feel like something's… amiss. The mess in her apartment never seemed to lessen, no matter how hard she tried to tidy up the place. She had to literally flip her place over just to find her glasses in the morning, when she distinctly remembers that she put them on the couch (or was it on the kitchen counter?). Her attempts to make tea was a little too bitter, a little too strong for her taste, that she just ends up dumping the acrid water down the drain.

It was a little over two weeks when she finally got the answer to her unvoiced musings. Surprisingly, it was actually Erwin who made her realize that something was wrong.

"You and Levi really got along well these past three years, huh?" he asked from his place from her couch, phone in his hand as he stared at something on the small screen.

Hange – who was on the dining table and finishing the last of her reports – snapped her head towards his direction, "What?"

The blond looked over his shoulder and turned the device to face her direction, a small smile on his lips, "You and Levi," he repeated, "The two of you really got closer during those three years."

She frowned and stood up, walking closer to his place. With her face close to the screen, Hange can actually see what he was talking about.

The photo was shared by one of their mutual friends, more than a year ago. It was supposed to be a group photo but most of them were preoccupied with other things. She squinted, pushing her glasses further up her nose and saw herself and Levi, on the farthest back, standing close to each other.

Hange had a wide grin on her lips, her eyes bright with mirth while Levi had his usual scowl as he stared at her. She didn't notice it then but, looking at the photo now, she saw that there's something _different_ with how he scowled at her. There's a hint of gentleness on his gaze, a softness that she rarely sees on his face.

Hange blinked. She had to be mistaken, right?

She straightened up and gave a nonchalant laugh, "Yeah! We've been friends since childhood, anyway."

Erwin raised an eyebrow, still with that small, calm smile on his face, "Is that so? I'll keep that in mind, then."

As Hange settled on her seat on the dining table, the nagging feeling at the back of her mind for the past two weeks finally brought itself to the front. The realization hit her like a ton of bricks and she dropped the pen that she was holding, earning a confused look from her companion as she scrambled to pick up the fallen pen.

She had not seen or heard from Levi in more than two weeks.

* * *

She tried to call his phone the very next day, but the robotic voice from the other line only echoed loudly in her ear.

_The number you have dialed is either unattended or out of coverage area. Please check the number –_

Hange dropped the phone on her desk and frowned at her desktop screen, her fingers tapping the wooden surface in an angry beat. Was he ignoring her because of what happened the last time they were in his apartment? She already sent a message to his work and personal email, but all she got back was an automatic response. She also tried to send a direct message to his social media accounts but the last time he was active was three days ago.

She huffed in annoyance, ignoring the growing worry in her chest and tried to get back to her work but her mind wasn't keen on cooperating with her. It continued to drift back to her best friend, who she might have hurt severely the last time that they met. She gave a sigh of exasperation, leaning back on her chair in a resigned manner. She's too preoccupied, too distracted to even attempt to pretend working.

Hange stared up at the ceiling, eyes straining slightly at the bright, white light of the office. It bothered her, this silence from Levi. Though he's not a very talkative person to begin with, he always made sure to send her a text or call her at least once a day just to check in on her.

_But that was before, when they were –_

"Hey."

She was startled out of her thoughts with Erwin's deep voice. She turned her head and there he stood, looking at her with that gentle smile, his blue eyes bright under the fluorescent light.

"It's lunch time," he said, still smiling, "Let's go."

Unbidden, her eyes drifted to where her phone is, right next to her pen holder. She inhaled deeply and gave Erwin an apologetic smile.

"Sorry, Erwin," she spoke with a sheepish tone, "I still have too much work. You go on ahead."

His forehead creased, the corners of his mouth turning down slightly, "You sure?"

She nodded, a little too enthusiastically, if she's being honest, "Yeah, I'm sure Erwin. Go ahead, I'll be fine."

"Alright," he replied, though he still looked uncertain. He turned and started to walk away from her desk. Once she's sure that he's no longer within earshot, Hange snatched her phone up and dialed Levi's number again.

* * *

_The number you have dialed is either unattended or out of coverage area. Please check the number or try your call again._

_I'm currently out of the office. Will respond immediately upon return._

_Active 7 days ago._

_0 posts._

* * *

Hange worried her teeth over her lower lip, a wave of apprehension washing over her as she stood outside Levi's apartment building. She remembered the last time she was in his place. Levi was obviously furious, absolutely enraged at the fact that she got back with Erwin and he slammed the door of his room to her face.

She tried to wait in his living room, staying for at least three hours before an emergency in her office made her leave his apartment. Standing outside his building, she felt oddly nervous. Her mind had not let her sleep the night before, trying to come up of all the possible scenarios that she can think of, an attempt to, at least predict the possible outcome of her impromptu visit.

She exhaled and made her way inside, up to his unit at the fifth floor. As she stood before his apartment door, Hange was suddenly filled with nerves once again. She huffed, shook her hands on her sides, shuffled from one foot to the other. She raised her fist, only to drop it to her side again. She started to pace, clearly agitated.

"You can do this, alright, Zoë?" she muttered to herself, "You're just going to talk to him. He's been your friend for more than a decade. You can do this."

She huffed, squared her shoulders, faced the door again and, before she can lose her courage, raised her hand and knocked. She waited with bated breath, fingers clenching around nothing. She can do this. Whatever the outcome of this talk will be, she'll accept it. If he's still mad, she will –

Her heart nearly stopped when the door opened.

A middle-aged woman was on the other side of the door, an apron still tied around her waist.

Hange blinked.

The woman gave her a confused look, "Can I help you?" she asked apprehensively.

The bespectacled woman shook her head, barely managing to stutter out an answer, "Oh! Um… n-nothing. I-I'm so sorry for my mistake! I must have knocked on the wrong door…" she said apologetically, muttering the last part to herself. She glanced at the number of the unit beside this one, brows furrowing when it showed _503._ Levi's apartment is _504._ The unit that the woman emerged from _is 504._

The woman still stared at her with concern on her eyes, "Is… everything okay, sweetheart?"

Hange looked back at the woman, eyes wide with bewilderment, "I-I guess," she said, uncertainty evident in her voice, "Uh… if I may ask, are you new here?"

She smiled, "Oh, yes. I just moved in about a week ago. The former tenant moved out in a hurry and I managed to rent this place out. Do you know him?"

Oh.

_Oh._

Realization dawned on Hange, posture stiffening slightly and her mouth fell open with shock. Levi… moved out of his apartment? Of all the scenarios that she ran through her head for the past few days, _this_ was definitely not included.

She blinked, trying to shake out the shock and hurt still running through her. She opened her mouth, only to close them again, her tongue inexplicably heavy and dry inside her mouth. The woman still stared at her with concern and confusion but Hange couldn't find the right words, struggled to organize and articulate the thoughts that seemed to fly around in her head. Levi left his apartment about a week ago, without telling _her?_ Without telling her _anything_ at all?

Was it because of their argument? Did she hurt him badly? They've been friends for as long as she can remember and, though their past arguments had been petty at best, they always made up right after and tried to talk about their indifferences. But this? Hange is not sure what to do, what to think, what to say, what –

"Dear," the woman spoke cautiously, breaking through the daze that her mind had entered to, "Is something wrong? Do you need a doctor or something?"

Hange blinked a few times and swallowed, "Y-yeah, I'm alright, thank you. May I ask if you know where… the former tenant is now?"

She shook her head and Hange's heart plummeted even further down, "I'm sorry but I don't know."

* * *

Hange plopped down on her couch with a heavy sigh, nearly dragging her feet back to her apartment after the revelation that she had that day. She clicked the power button of her phone, sighing when she saw no new notifications. She messaged their mutual friends on her way back to her place, asking them if they knew where Levi moved to. Unfortunately, none of them does, only telling her that he, apparently, moved to the other side of the city, but they don't know exactly where.

She opened her contacts, scrolling until she reached his name. Her thumb hovered, hesitating, overthinking the fact that he didn't talk to her for more than a fucking week already. She huffed, dropping the phone on the cushion beside her and removed her glasses, tossing it beside her device. She leaned her head on the back of the couch, arm covering her eyes and she gave a loud sigh. She's mad – no, she's _livid_ with what Levi had done. She understands that he's angry but for him to give her a silent treatment instead of smoothing things out left her seething.

But, there's a strange twinge in her heart that she felt ever since that woman told her that Levi was no longer in that apartment. The twinge was getting hard for her to ignore, and she laid her palm on the center of her chest, fingers clawing at the fabric of her shirt. She's hurting too, because she misses her best friend, her confidante. The person who saw her at her lowest low, who cradled her when she's most vulnerable, the person who knew her best.

She sighed again, this time in resignation, and picked her phone up again. She was about to press the _call_ button when a knock from her front door startled her. She frowned and glanced at her device. There's no message that would notify her of any visitor, and she wasn't expecting anybody either. She was intent on ignoring the knocks when a thought occurred to her.

_But what if its Levi?_

She suddenly jumped to her feet, making her way excitedly to the door with a grin. If its Levi, she will talk to him, she will apologize, she will –

"Hi," Erwin greeted with a smile, a bag of fast-food take-out on his hand.

Her face fell before she can stop herself, disappointment settling on her stomach. It's Erwin. It's just Erwin.

The change on her expression did not go unnoticed by her boyfriend, and his own smile diminished, "Is… something wrong, Hange? Were you expecting somebody else?"

Hange quickly recovered and flashed him her usual grin, "No, no!" she lied smoothly and quickly changed the topic, waving her hand on the bag that he carried, "What's that?"

Erwin still looked doubtful but he answered her question nonetheless, "It's… food. I figured you hadn't eaten dinner yet," he replied, "Hey, are you sure it's a good time? I can leave…"

"Don't be ridiculous, Erwin!" she quickly reassured, "I'm not expecting anybody else. Come on in inside!"

Before she closed the door behind him, Hange chanced a quick glance out the hallway, hoping to catch a glimpse, maybe even a shadow, of her best friend.

Nothing.

* * *

_The number you have dialed is either unattended or out of coverage area. Please check the number or try your call again._

_I'm currently out of the office._

_Active 22 days ago._

_0 posts._

* * *

That night, Hange discovered so many things.

Her skin blazed hot whenever Erwin touched her; whereas with Levi, she felt a sense of calm every time his rough hands ran over her body, hands that ignited embers beneath her skin that kept her wanting for more without burning her from the inside. When Erwin kissed her, she had to keep up with his ferocity; but Levi used to match the tempo of her lips: slowing down when she's out of breath and meeting her kisses with the same intensity that she does. When Erwin wrapped her in his arms that night, she felt constricted and almost suffocated, even with the air-condition; Levi's embrace felt like a light blanket wrapping around her during a summer night, that promised utter comfort and safety.

Hange stayed up all night, mulling over the fact that she had started to compare her boyfriend over her best friend, with Levi being the superior one, and she realized that her interactions with Erwin no longer felt the same, no longer the way it had felt when they were first together, more than three years ago.

Over the past three years, Levi had started to feel like _home_.

* * *

She scrolled through her phone's album, finding hundreds upon hundreds of pictures of her and Levi, all taken from the past three years. As she stared at the photos, she realized that Levi was almost always looking at her. She stared at little longer and she found that his eyes seemed a lot softer, his expression a tad bit gentler when he's gazing at her.

Her chest tightened inexplicably with guilt because oh, why hadn't she noticed it before?

She fell asleep looking at one of their photos, thinking that maybe, just maybe, her mind can manifest him hard enough and he'll suddenly appear in her apartment out of the blue and wrap her in his arms.

She felt foolish when she woke up alone.

* * *

_H: Please Levi, talk to me?_

_H: What's the matter?_

_H: Hey, we're going out tonight with Nanaba and Miche! :D_

_H: You can come with us!_

_H: Please Levi : (_

_H: Hey Levi! We're at Sina Bar! Let's go! :D_

_H: Heyyyy LEviiiiii_

_Message Delivered_

* * *

When Hange finally had her day-off, she decided to pester her high school friend.

"Please, Miche!" she pleaded, following the burly man around his kitchen, "I just really, really, _really,_ need to talk to Levi!"

Miche snorted and his hand continued to peel the fruits, "And face the wrath of an Ackerman? He may be a midget but he's got a wicked punch."

Hange clasped her hands, "But Miche, please! It's been more than a month since I last talked to him!" she exclaimed; desperation evident in her voice.

The blond was silent for a moment, putting the peeler and the apple down on the table, "Hange," he drawled, "Why do you want to talk to talk to Levi? What happened between the two of you?"

She blinked, slightly taken aback by the question, "I thought you knew why I wanted to talk to him."

He snorted, "I don't. So, I want to hear what happened."

She looked down at her lap, suddenly ashamed and almost rendered speechless, "I… We argued the last time that I saw him. That was when I told him that I got back together with Erwin. I… hurt his feelings too much and now he's avoiding me."

Miche hummed, "And why do you want to talk to him?"

She rolled her eyes, her fingers playing with the edge of the table cloth, "To apologize, of course!"

"And?"

Hange stilled her movements, "I should do… more?" she asked uncertainly.

Miche sighed and stood up, walking over to his counter. When he returned a few minutes later, he had a small paper with a number scribbled messily with a pencil, "Figure out what you need to do," he told her as he picked up the fruit and his peeler again, "And, for the love of all, don't tell him where you got his number."

She looked at him with wide eyes, "Wait! What do I need to do?"

The blond kept his mouth shut.

* * *

She missed him so much. Gosh, she missed him so much.

Erwin had noticed the change in her, but didn't say anything yet. But his touches had become hesitant, his approaches, reluctant.

Hange had tried to call Levi numerous times with the number that she got from Miche, but it always went to voicemail.

_This is Levi Ackerman. Leave a message after the beep._

There's a strange emptiness on her chest that seemed to go wider and deeper every time she hears that voice.

* * *

_This is Levi Ackerman. Leave a message after the beep._

_Message Delivered_

_Active 37 days ago._

_0 posts._

* * *

She tried to call Levi, day after day after day, leaving voice mails every time, though she never got a response. In her loneliness, her mind conjured all the times that they spent together and she wants to punch herself because she never realized how much he meant to her until she hurt him, until she lost him.

* * *

Erwin broke up with her for the second time.

He had a grim expression on his face when he showed up at her apartment that night, exactly 45 days since the last time she talked to Levi. It was the same expression that he had when he first broke things off with her and, upon seeing the look on his face, she immediately thought, _'Oh no.'_

"I think we should end this, Hange," he said without any preamble, standing just inside her doorway, "I know you're not as invested in this relationship as I am, not the way you used to."

She could lie, tell him that that's not true, that it's all in his imagination, that she loves him and only him. But Hange wants to be honest to Erwin as much as possible, and staying in this relationship is not going to help them, nor make the two of them happy.

"I'm so sorry, Erwin," she whispered, guilty tears making its way down her cheeks.

But Erwin only smiled, a gentle and sad one. His own blue eyes filled with tears as he gently wiped away her tears and left her place without looking back.

* * *

She was on her way back to her apartment, waiting at the bus stop when she finally saw him again.

Levi was sitting by the window, looking out towards the bustling city. Exhilaration filled her and she waved her arms above her head to get his attention.

"Levi!" she called out, her grin large and eyes hopeful. If he sees her, he'll get off the bus, finally talk to her and maybe they can be friends again and that's a good start to everything and –

He finally looked down, his eyes lazily watching the people at the waiting shed. Hange redoubled her efforts, waving her arms frantically and calling out his name louder. She probably looked ridiculous and she can actually feel the stares of the other people but she doesn't care. Levi is here and she'll be damned if he doesn't notice her.

When his eyes finally settled on her, his eyes were apathetic, expression stoic and he stared _past_ her, as if she's made of smoke and he's seeing right through her form.

Hange dropped her arms and the bus sped away.

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Hange sat under the waiting shed, her head between her hands and her eyes staring at the dirt that had stuck itself on her shoes. She fucked up and she lost him now. She lost Levi because she's a fucking idiot who had the gall to proclaim herself a genius when she's the densest person on the earth, who unable to comprehend his feelings, _her_ own feelings. Tears swam in her eyes, blurring her vision and she blinked her eyes rapidly to stop the tears from falling. It's already embarrassing that she looked utterly miserable under this shed; she's determined not to completely lose her dignity by crying in public.

She took a deep breath and exhaled deeply, trying to compose herself. She was about to stand up when a voice made her freeze in her motions.

"Four-eyes."

She's gone mad. She must've gone crazy. Because when she raised her head, Levi was standing before her with that usual scowl on his face. But she didn't miss the softness that's on his eyes, and it made her want to weep because oh, why hadn't she noticed it before?

"You look like shit," he spoke in a monotone as he moved to stand directly in front of her.

And she laughed. She laughed with surprise, with happiness, with relief, that filled her entire being. She cautiously reached her hand out and her laughter became louder when his rough hand grasped hers tightly.

"Yeah, well, someone thought it would be a good idea to ghost me," she retorted to his barb, a little belated but she's just so happy and relieved because _Levi is here, he's here and he's solid and he's real._

He clicked his tongue, the corner of his lip curling upwards into a smirk, "Heard you were looking for me. Why?"

"To tell you how much of an idiot I have been for the past three years."

He snorted, his expression softening further, "Damn right, you are."

Levi gently tugged her hand, "Come on, four-eyes. I'm starving. There's a good place about a block away from here."

She grinned and stood up, following his footsteps.

"Hey," she spoke playfully, "Can we consider this a date?"

He shrugged, but a veil of apprehension had covered his eyes, "I don't know. Can we?"

Hange smiled, a gentle smile, and she tightened her hand around his, "We can, Levi. We can."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: i actually received three suggestions on this second part  
> 1) give levihan a happy ending :)  
> 2) make hange sad :(  
> 3) make levi sadder :((
> 
> so i thought, maybe, it would work if i tried to incorporate all the suggestions into one? :D so, uhm... tell me what you think? :)))

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: im so sorry i portrayed erurihan this way!! :((
> 
> but anyway, i had fun making this one shot :D  
> this was an idea given to me by a friend and i hope she likes this! 
> 
> songs i listened to while i wrote:
> 
> Breakeven - the script  
> Manhattan - sara bareilles


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